THE
106th KHUTBAH DELIVERED AT AREA 10 JUMA’AT MASJID ABUJA, BY IMAM
YAHYA GARBA AL-YOLAWI, ON 10TH FEB 2017/ 12TH JUMADA ULA 1438AH
TOPIC: DUTIES AND RESPONSIBILITIES OF HUSBAND &
WIFE IN ISLAM (2)
In the name of Allah
the Most Gracious the most Merciful
My dear respected brothers and sisters in Islam;
Our last week’s khutbah mainly centered on duties and responsibilities of wife
and today’s sermon will look at the duties and obligations of Husband in Islam.
As we have said
previously, Islam is very much concern with issues related to marriage and what
comes after marriage agreement. In order to maintain peace and good harmony
among families, and between husband and wife; Islam has prescribed certain
duties and
responsibilities to the husband and place certain duties and
responsibilities on wife to balance the equation and whenever those rights are
neglected or violated a lots of chaos and evils will find their way in to your
life as husband or wife. Allah says: “…And due to the wives is similar to what
is expected of them, according to what is reasonable. But the men have a degree
over them [in responsibility and authority]. And Allah is exalted in Might and
Wise." [Quran 2: 228]
Basically , there are financial obligations over her husband, which are includes dowry, feeding clothing and general spending (Nafaqa) and accommodation and Non-financial rights; such as been just, fair
showing equality between co-wives, being treated in anice, decent, kind, love
and respectful manner, and not being treated in an offensive, hash, rude, harmful
or disrespectful manners by her husband.
Some of the verses and ahadith on duties and
responsibilities of husband to his wife includes:
1. Fear
Allah concerning your wives and treat them well.
It was narrated from Jabir that the Messenger
of Allah (SAW) said in his Farewell Sermon:“Fear Allah concerning women! Verily
you have taken them on the security of Allah, and enjoyment with them has been
made lawful unto you by words of Allah. You too have rights over them and that
they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed [i.e., not let them into the
house] whom you do not like…” Muslim,
1218)
2. Financial
obligations (Nafaqah) in feeding and clothing without stinginess or
extravagance:
Allah (SWT) says: “Let the rich man spend
according to his means; and the man whose resources are restricted, let him
spend according to what Allah has given him” [Q 65:7]
The scholars of Islam are agreed
that it is obligatory for husbands to spend on his wife, on the condition that
the wife makes herself available to her husband. If she refuses him or rebels,
then she is not entitled to that spending.The reason why it is obligatory to
spend on her is that the woman is available to her husband only because of the
marriage contract, and she is not allowed to leave the marital home except with
his permission. So he has to spend on her and provide for her, full fill all
her basic needs and this is in return for her making herself available to him.
3.
shelter or Accommodation. This is also
one of the wife’s rights, which means that her husband should prepare for her
accommodation according to his means and ability. Allah (SWT) says:
“Lodge them [in a section] of where you dwell out of your means and do
not harm them in order to oppress them”.[Q 65:6]
Non-financial rights and obligations:
4.
Kind treatment. The husband must have a
good attitude towards his wife and be kind to her, and offer her everything
that may soften her heart towards him, because Allah says “…and live with them
honorably” [Q 4:19]“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as
regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as
regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable” [al-Baqarah 2:228]
5.
Teaching and guidingher
to religious of Allah: Allah say: “O you who have believed, protect yourselves
and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones, over which are
[appointed] angels, harsh and severe; they do not disobey Allah in what He
commands them but do what they are commanded”.Q66:6
6.
Just & Fair treatment of co-wives.
One of the rights that a wife has over her husband is that she and her co-wives
should be treated equally, if the husband has other wives, with regard to
nights spent with them, spending and clothing. It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah
(R.A) said: “The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said: ‘Be kind to women....’”(Narrated
by al-Bukhaari, 3153; Muslim, 1468).
7.
Not harming one’s wife. This is one of the
basic principles of Islam. Because harming others is haram in the case of other
people, it is even more so in the case of one’s wife. It was narrated from
‘UbadahbnSaamit that the Messenger of Allah (SAW) said, “There should be no
harming nor reciprocating harm.” (Narrated by IbnMaajah,, 2340)
8.
The best among you are those who treat
their wives in best manner the messenger of Allah (SAW) has said: "Best
among you are those who behave well with their women."
9.
You should not hate your wife: "No
believing man should have enmity and hatred against a believing woman. If he
dislikes certain habits of that woman, there would certainly be some virtues in
her too."The Hadith means that the woman must be having both good and bad
habits. Man should not always point out her bad habits only. He should also
appreciate her good habits.
10.
The husband should satisfy his wife's physical
needs.Allah (SWT) says:It has been made
permissible for you the night preceding fasting to go to your wives [for sexual
relations]. They are clothing [against sinful sexual affairs] for you and you are clothing for them…” Q2:187
The Sharee'ah has not prescribed any limit for
this. But, he has to ensure that woman's minimum sexual requirements are met so
that she may not commit a sin by eyeing other men in order to quench her
thirst. There are certain men who, after marriage, do not take care of the
sexual needs of their wives. Such people are great sinners and will be severely
convicted in the sight of Allah. Allah
swt has granted women the right to conjugal relations with their husbands.
In
addition to that:
11.
Husband should appreciate his wife and
never appreciate the beauty and other merits of other woman in front of his
wife. This may lead to create jealousy and suspicion in the mind of his wife.
She would think that her husband has some feelings or relations with that
woman. This thought is a poison that kills matrimonial relations and should be
avoided.
12.
In order to maintain peace and prosperity in
the married life, both the wife and the husband should respect and take care of
each other's opinions and emotions. The anger of husband brings to the wife
nothing but tension, depression and confusion. Similarly, the anger of the wife
brings to the husband nothing but disappointment, mental torture, frustration
and bitterness. It is, therefore, advisable to both husband and wife to be
patient and compassionate in their dealings.
13.
Trust and confidence: The husband should
express his full confidence and trust in his wife and, to prove this, he should
hand over the domain of the house to her so that she may feel dignified and involved.
The Prophet (SAW) said that the woman is the guardian and caretaker of her
husband's house and Almighty Allah (SWT) will take an account from her in this
regard on the Day of Judgement. The very benefit of relying on the wife would
be that she would feel herself responsible for a vital department in the set up
of the household. This will give the husband an opportunity to freely think of
other things regarding the promotion , growth development and progress of his
career or business.
15.
Keeping secrets and privacy: The husband should never share the secrets of his
wife with others. The messenger of Allah said: "Worst is the person in the
sight of Allah who goes to his wife and then discloses her secrets …".
16.
The husband should be neat and clean as he expects the same from his wife. He
should look smart, dynamic nice and a loveable person.
18.
The husband should not level charges ofsuspicion or corrupt practices against
his wife without going into the depth of the matter. The relationship between a
husband and a wife is based purely on mutual understanding. They have to trust
each other. Any baseless suspicion against each other would mar the relations
of the husband and wife.
These are but few items
of the many rights that Islam, the religion of truth, imposes upon those who
commit themselves to follow and practice it as a way of life. We vividly see
that such rights, if maintained properly, will lead the society to peace,
happiness and tranquility.
A husband becomes more
respected, adored, cared for, highly needed and appreciated if he respects the
rights of his wife, and equally be given
the rights he is entitled for by Islam.
We ask Allah the most
High to continue to guard and protect our iman our family and general
muslimUmmah.AMEEN
Contact: yahyalyolawi@gmail.com
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